The Worst Film I Won't Be Able To Stop Myself From Seeing!!!

Okay, so I just saw this trailer today and I seriously cannot help myself from laughing out loud!

I am a fan of all sorts of films, but when it all comes down to it, there are only two kinds of movies: 1) those that are made extremely well, and 2) those that are so bad they are good. I can't help but hope this one is the latter.

Mega Shark VS Giant Octopus (the title says it all!!) is the tale...(no really, the title says it all) of two 10,000,000 year old...(I'm not kidding, you can skip this paragraph) giant animals duking it out in the ocean...(are you still reading this?!?), much to the chagrin of us bipedal dirt roamers. What else can I say!? It's all right there in the title. (duh!!)

I know how sad this will sound. But, I am nearly always drawn to a movie that is so obviously cheesy that they announce the entire plot in its moniker. It's the reason I was hopelessly destined to see Snakes On A Plane and Killer Clowns From Outer Space. And it will be the same reason I will be unable to stop myself from running out and renting this likely piece of junk. Oh, Heaven save me from myself!!

I am very excited to watch this movie. Almost more excited than I am to see Star Trek!....

okay, sorry! You can put your phasers down. I didn't mean it.

Anyway, here is the movie trailer below. Be sure to watch for the extreme tension of the moment when "It Rises!"

If the embedded video doesn't work, here is the link to it on Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa7ck5mcd1o

Burn After Blogging

BURN AFTER READING

Ok. So, here is a recipe for success:

Take 2 Academy Award Winning Directors, 5 cups of an extremely strong cast, 1 tablespoon of intriguing espionage plot, a dash of comedy, and a pinch of sex. Mix together in a film-can, slowly stirring in anticipation with a great trailer. Bake at 350 degrees for 1 hour and 36 minutes or until...burned.

Unfortunately, the Coen Brothers may not have let this dish cook long enough.

Burn After Reading tells the story of several strangers who get tangled up in a web of lies and deceit over what is supposedly a disc filled with CIA secrets. As the plot thickens, the character's lives cross paths in many strange, exciting, and deadly ways. The funny part is...it's all much ado about nothing at all.

The acting was solid, and the plot was not uninteresting, but the pacing definitely needed work. At times it was slow, and at others it felt as if I had completely missed something. Honestly, I actually felt like specific scenes were fully missing. For example, (technically there are spoilers ahead, but if you've seen the trailer you know what I'm talking about) we are first shown Tilda Swinton creating a copy of financial CIA documents from her husband's (John Malkovitch) computer. However, when we next see the disc it is being viewed by Brad Pitt on his computer. It was as if the entire process of the disc's loss was cut from the movie. The directors later give us a nod as to how the disc may have traveled, but it was too little too late. (end of spoiler).

I was also disappointed by the humor that I was expecting. The trailer actually made me laugh out loud when I first saw it. But, I found that when I saw them in context, they just weren't as humorous. There were some other fun moments, of course. But, it just wasn't as exciting as I expected.

I loved the acting, though. Brad Pitt was great. Several times, I got caught up in his rhythmic enjoyment of life and his ipod. I felt that Frances McDormand could have been a little bit more over the top, but she was still very good. George Cloony struck me as the typical George Cloony character: smooth-talking, good with the ladies, yet still sensitive...but in a manly way, of course. Both John Malcovitch and Tilda Swinton brought a great deal to the screen as well. In fact, there isn't much more I could have asked for in a cast.

I have been told that many people complained that the film didn't go anywhere. This is true. However, that is kind of the point. The film even goes so far as to say this at one point. The point is (for those of you who need one) that these events were caused by people being caught up in their own narcissistic worlds. (Spoilers) John Malkovitch was too proud to be reassigned. Brad Pitt overestimates his knowledge about what it is he has found. Frances McDormand is fixated on her own desires. George Cloony is only seeking self-gratification, and so on. (End of Spoilers). Had they stopped and thought for a moment about what they were doing or how it was affecting the people around them, there would have never been a problem and therefore no story. So, yes. The movie doesn't seem to have a point; but that IS the point!

In the end, the movie was good, but I found I had a hard time concentrating. There were moments when my mind would wander and I would come back to the film, but feel as though I hadn't missed much. I might recommend this film to people who love Coen Brothers movies. However, I would warn them that it is not their best work.

Labor Day movie-fest!

So, I ended up seeing several movies this holiday weekend.


THE DARK KNIGHT (PART II)

"Either you die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain."

Yesterday (Labor Day), I saw TDK for the third time (2nd time in IMAX)!

I was reminded once again of the stunning prowess of Heath Ledger's performance. My favorite part (SPOILERS AHEAD! Highlight to read) is still when he is dressed up as a nurse wearing an "I believe in Harvey Dent" sticker, hopping out of the hospital, explosions all around. Suddenly the detonation halts, and he turns back. Still playful yet slightly miffed, he presses the button on his remote several more times. The burst of another detonation causes him to flinch just before he laughs and jumps into a retreating school bus. (END OF SPOILERS)

A couple of the friends I was with yesterday indicated that they still preferred Batman Begins to its sequel. However, without detracting from the brilliance of Nolan's first Batman installment, I must say that TDK felt more tense, had more to say, and was better executed. Unfortunately, all my friend could say about her preference for Begins was that she prefers movies wherein she does not have to think. While I agree that the story included much more action and close-up fight scenes, this cannot compare to the storyline in Knight. TDK offers monumental moral dillemmas packed into small spaces. (POSSIBLE SPOILERS AHEAD) Each moral choice incrementally leads Batman (as well as Harvey Dent) deeper into the Joker's rabbit hole. As the heroes try, desperately, to hang on to both their own and their city's souls, they find that their fastidious grasp on reality is not so strong. In the end, one Knight cannot abide the torturous strain and loses his soul. Nevertheless, the other Knight, his foil, becomes his savior as he acts as proxy for the sins of the first, leaving him unblemeshed. (END OF SPOILERS).

I apologize to my friend who prefers not to think in her movies, but personally, I believe Christopher Nolan and his team have topped themselves and given themselves the almost insurmountable task of creating a third installment that lives up to its predecessors.





HAMLET 2

"I'm simultaneously horrified...and fascinated."

This weekend, I also took in a "double-dip" of comedy at the theater on Friday. I know theater hopping is not what everyone would consider honest (or that anyone would consider honest). But, sometimes, the theaters just make it too easy...sorry mom.

For those who may not be aware, Hamlet 2 is a small, independent movie that tells the story of Dana Marschz, a down-on-his-luck former actor turned drama teacher who is threatened with the cancellation of the school's theater program. In response, along with the inspiration of a 9-year-old theater critic, he decides to pen what becomes a crass, offensive, and possibly illegal sequel to William Shakespeare's most famous creation..."based on [Dana's] life."

Those familiar with the story of Hamlet, the Dane will, of course, remember that at the end of Shakespeare's opus, all of the main characters are dead. Thus, Dana determines that Hamlet's task in the sequel must be to SAVE his loved ones. The use of a time-machine was never more needed. And if people are to be saved, who better to conscript to the cause than THE Savior...Jesus.

To avoid getting into all the details of the plot, I will simply move on to review the movie itself. Although, it starts off rather uneven and with slow pacing, the final act of the film could not be more funny. Many of the jokes in the beginning are strained and often overlap leaving the audience feeling ambiguous. A ray of light, however, is cast by Katherine Keener who's portrayal of Dana's wife, Brie, offers a beautiful dichotomous love-hate relationship with her husband as well as their boarder. She was quite hilarious right up to her sudden exit from the film.

Steve Coogan as Dana Marschz has his moments, but tends to try too hard to make the audience laugh. His dedication to his character's sense of drama is commendable, but his over-the-top style tended to stand out in a rather cartoonish manner when set against the backdrop of the movie. This is not entirley unexpected considering the script was written in part by one of the creators of "South Park." However, in the third act, the rest of the cast rises to Dana's level of enthusiasm which allows his off-beat acts to become less awkward and more humorous. At this point, I began to laugh long and hard.


THE HOUSE BUNNY

I know, I know....sorry.

Ok. Let me get this out in the open. I really like Anna Faris. I think she is funny, as well as sexy. I loved her turn in Entourage and actually enjoyed parts of Scary Movie (and possibly a sequel or two). However, I was not so excited by the plot of this movie (a Playboy bunny who is deemed "too old" is forced out of the mansion and moves in with a group of geeky sorority girls). But, when I walked out of Hamlet 2 on Friday and noticed that the theater next to it was showing the house bunny, and that it was starting right then...I wandered on in.

There are no real surprises here. Anna's character (the sexy playboy bunny) is thrust in with 7 seemingly plain/ugly geeks only to turn them into the "hot" girls they should be - they, in return show her that looks aren't everything. Blah, blah, blah.

Despite a couple of funny moments, this movie falls pretty flat. I am disappointed, because I feel like Anna could do so much better. She is a step above the Scary Movie franchise here, but not much. I would love to see her career take a different direction. Anyway, the biggest fault of the film, is that it steps on its own toes. It tries to portray an image of feminism and girl-power, yet it's vehicle for doing so is the use of sex and physical attraction. The sorority girls are all the "beautiful inside" stereotype who are rejected from the rest of the school until they are transformed by the Playboy playmate into the frat boys' dream-girls. Exactly how do they expect to sell an ideology of the effectiveness and power of women through their objectification?

At any rate, I don't expect many people who read this blog to even have a great desire to see this film, but I did (thankfully for free), so I felt it my duty to report. Nevertheless, should any of you be wandering around your local theater or some day through your nearest blockbuster, and pick it up...I might recommend looking around a bit more before deciding to bring this one home.

Summer Wrap-Up

Hi Everyone,

Yes. I have, yet again, neglected my duty to report the finest of movies offered to us by the film gods. I deeply apologize and hope to serve you better in the future. Now, let's see how the film business has fared since my last submission on....YIKES...July, 2nd!!!

THE DARK KNIGHT

Wow! I mean, what can I say about a movie that has earned the second largest domestic gross of all time in under 2 months? What can I say about a movie that demolished all expectations of acting, direction, effects, and writing? How can I possibly sum up what this movie said to the world, how it made people feel, not to mention the more than fantastic transformation of Heath Ledger (God rest him) into the most nefarious of DC Comics villains?

In honesty, I can't.

So much has been said about this film and its accomplishments already. Suffice it to say that it was, by far, the best movie I saw this summer. Iron Man was awesome. Wall-E was incredible. But, The Dark Knight was truly a sight to behold...especially in IMAX.

Unfortunately, the remainder of July releases left a lot to be desired. Fortunately, it allowed audiences to continue to support TDK in its climb toward 'Titanic' amounts of money. July gave us The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor, The X-files: I want to believe, and another Kevin Costner bomb - Swing Vote. All of which are forgettable - or, at least should be forgotten.

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS & TROPIC THUNDER

These were two highly anticipated comedies that broke-out one right on the heels of the other. Although Pineapple came out earlier, I ended up seeing TT first.

Tropic Thunder was a satirical romp through the jungle lampooning movie makers, actors, and the lengths to which they will go to make their film as realistic as possible. I laughed hysterically right from the beginning during the trailers tied in to the movie. The picture was filled with surprises and wit that left me feeling extremely entertained. Ben Stiller as the clueless action-star-trying-on-dramatic-role was a refreshing break from his typical klutzy, clueless, accident-prone everyman characters, and he actually did well with it. You see, Ben! It's okay to explore every once in a while. His turn as director was also surprisingly sensitive. He walked the line of distaste and satire keenly and allowed his audience to think rather than spoon-feed his comedy to them.

Jack Black was unfortunately, not much more than his usual high-energy humorous self. I would have liked to see his character delve more deeply than being uni-dimensionally focused on a drug problem. However, he did have several funny moments. Robert Downey, Jr. was incredible as the Australian White actor turned African-American. He and Stiller played off each other in hilarious and provocative ways. However, I must admit that my favorite comedic moments came from an actor whose career I had long-since thought to be as dead as my former pet cat...Tom Cruise as Les Grossman. He was brilliant. Every scene in which he appeared sent me into absolute hysterics. I don't recall Cruise ever being this funny before. He may be whacked out of his gourd in real-life. But, I'll be darned if he can't still bring it on screen.

However, this would not be a complete review unless I pointed out some of the low points as well. The movie sort of lost momentum at the end. The pacing was going along fine until the last 30 minutes of the movie, where the plot took a soft nose-dive into some muddy areas. Where the comedy was crisp and relatively rapid-fire in the beginning, the end became much less engaging. Also, several moments of the film were predictable, but that could be forgiven considering the type of movie it was. Overall, it was an enjoyable movie that left me with tears of laughter in my eyes.

Pineapple Express, on the other hand, was exactly the opposite, pacing-wise. I found myself laughing only occasionally during the bulk of the movie. I think I was expecting something a little more surreal than what I found. This, I understood, was to be a "stoner movie." Thus, I expected a lot more Harold and Kumar type humor than what was presented. Of course, this is an Apatow production, so I should have expected something different. However, this didn't work for me. I will say that James Franco continues to impress me with his acting ability. He is able to find something in each of his characters that make them differ from everything else he has played. His very friendly but naive drug-dealer is likable as well as believable. Seth Rogen on the however, brings us the same thing we have seen from him before. Unfortunately, his humor, which was once surprising and new, is now stale and well-worn. The action was only so-so, and the plot meandered a bit which left me feeling like the movie was moving slowly on and on. At times, I felt myself distracted thinking about other things I needed to do that day rather than pay attention to the film. Granted, this is a stoner-film. Had I been high, I may have found it more engaging. Outside of Franco, the acting throughout the cast was less than optimal. Many characters and scenes were over-the-top which broke from the rest of the movie which felt as though it were trying to be grounded in a more realistic setting.

Despite the slow pacing and lack of rapid-fire humor typically associated with Judd Apatow's productions, the end was phenomenally funny. The final scene made me laugh harder than I had through the entirety of the movie all-together. The irony is that the intense humor in the final scene, rested completely on the fact that I had been on the journey with the characters. Had I not, the scene would have been senseless. Thus, one is caught in a comedic catch-22. Hence: the movie was not funny until the end - but, the end was only funny because of the rest of the movie.

Hancock

While this summer has given us it's share of ups and downs, this week's big event movie HANCOCK, leaves a little left to be desired. I hate to start off an entry sounding so blase, but I had high hopes for this film and it left me feeling disappointed.

Hancock is a Super-hero without a cause. He flies around saving people, but doesn't seem to know why. In fact, his carelessness often ends up causing more harm than good. He drinks and flies, makes mistakes, and is an entirely flawed hero. I was thankful for this premise when I saw the trailers for Hancock, hoping that the break from a typical super-hero formula would bring great things for the summer. Now, don't get me wrong, the idea is still solid. The premise is still entertaining not to mention humorous. But, the execution was almost as flawed as the hero.

For the first two-thirds of the movie, one is treated to a light-hearted journey of a man who happens to have super powers, but also has the problems of humanity. He feels unwanted, cast aside, and demeaned. He turns to alcohol as a defense mechanism, but that only leads to more mistakes and more harm. Those blunders and mistakes are actually quite funny and allow the audience to connect with the hero. Unfortunately, Will Smith's usually spot-on acting is tainted by a little too much indifference. Hancock's spite and cantankerous demeanor are downplayed into a somewhat blunted apathy, leaving the audience with a similar sense on occasion. Many critics have said that this may be the downfall of Will Smith's blockbusting career. I would not go so far. He did not do a horrible job. He made a choice as an actor. However, that choice left the audience unsure how to reconcile their views of his character. Is he really that indifferent? If so, why does he try? If he doesn't care, where does his anger come from?

The third act of the movie heralds the most issues. The movie takes a sudden and hard left turn. A plot twist - a very well planned plot twist, I must say - is introduced that throws the movie into a much more dramatic arena. While this is an attempt to up the ante by the film-maker, it falls a little short because again the audience is left to question where this all fits in with what the movie is. It was a comedy, now it's a drama. Where is it going? Moreover, a new villain is brought in with whom very little has been established. In order to avoid spoilers, I cannot divulge too much. But, suffice it to say, I did not have a strong belief in the motivation, let alone the ability of this villain. I cannot leave this review without pointing out the relative rapidity with which the writer puts down one altercation and picks up another. This leaves the film a little choppy. At times I thought I may hit my head on the screen because the plot hit the brakes so roughly.

Now, let me take a moment to highlight the better aspects of the film. It was not nearly as bad as some other attempts this summer. The action sequences were very exciting and the movie was incredibly funny when it was trying to be so. Hancock's erratic drunk flying is captured very well and has a great deal of humor attached to it. The story is relatively solid. However, it appears that studio execs may have gotten ahold of it and thrust in some unnecessary plot points.

It has been said that Jason Bateman is more or less reprising his role as Michael Bluth from Arrested Development in this film. I can see the resemblance, but he does such a good job and can be so funny that I am willing to give him that. No harm, no foul. Charlize Theron also does an admirable job considering the seemingly small part she plays. The emotional tension between her and Will Smith's characters is palpable each time they are on screen together. Often without words, there is an exchange of emotional information that is exquisitely clear.

In my final analysis, Hancock is worth seeing because it is a fun ride for the summer. However, I don't think it will go down in the annals of history as one of the classic blockbusters of our time. This movie will undoubtedly draw a lot of business, which is good, but it may not last long contending with the upcoming movies over the next few weeks.

Wanted Wall-E

Wow,

So, I guess I'm off to a pretty slow start. Let's check on the progress:

- Create a blog in October, check.

- Spend 3 months planning on writing blogs, but not doing it, check.

- Then spend 6 more months completely ignoring any intent whatsoever to write, check.

Okay, well now that the schedule has been completed let's get blogging.

The Summer Movie season is in full swing - and has been for some time. We've seen the releases of many highly anticipated films, some awful (You Don't Mess with the Zohan, The Happening, The Love Guru), some awesome (Iron Man, Get Smart, The Incredible Hulk), and some that were "awww too bad" (Indy4, Prince Caspian, Kung Fu Panda). This week's offering to the film gods, however, belongs in the "I want to see it again" category.

Wall-E is the story of a small robot programmed to clean up the Earth after humanity has left it behind filled with trash. Unfortunately, he is also the last gleaming bit of life on the planet. One day he chances to meet EVE who has been sent to look for signs of sustainable life on Earth and Wall-E is whisked away into a grand outer-space adventure.

This is Pixar's 9th feature film. In it, they continue to show that they are innovative artists, creative story-tellers, and above all else - risk-takers. The plot isn't necessarily new, but the story is fun, light-hearted, and enchanting. Despite Wall-E's lack of skin and bones, his humanity is entirely relatable. The animation is, as usual, crisp and engaging. Also, the animators take a great risk in bringing together live-action and CG animation, and they pull it off in a wonderful way. I can't tell you how much I loved the soundtrack. And the message being presented comes across clear, but it does not feel as though the writer's are shoving it down your throat.

With a single grind of his gears, Wall-E will make you laugh, cry, and fall in love. I highly recommend this movie to everyone.

The other wide release this week was "Wanted." This action-thriller stars Angelina Jolie, Morgan Freeman, and James McAvoy as highly-trained assassins who are trying to save the world one bad-guy at a time. This extremely predicable, not-so-high-energy movie misses the mark by a wide margin. The performances were flawed and uninteresting. The writing was flat and the direction left a lot to be desired. I wouldn't recommend the movie to most. Even if you want mind-less violence, there are better places to get it.

Until next time!

My new blog

So, I decided it was time to get a new, more official blog. Previously, I had been blogging on myspace.com. But, I have not been using it very much lately. In fact, it has been more than a couple months since I last logged-in on myspace. However, I still want to blog. So, here I am.

To get things started, I'll introduce myself somewhat. My name is Brad and I am a 4th year psychology grad student. I am also an amateur film-buff. I love movies and everything that goes into their creation, from idea to box-office and beyond. I go to at least one movie in theaters a week and I see more, if my financial situation allows it. However, I watch on average about 10 new movies on DVD per week. I may not have any training in film criticism, but I have what I consider an extensive film knowledge. I only say all this because my typical blogs tend to come out as movie reviews. I don't talk much about myself in these things, but I love to talk movies. So, if you're here to read about movies and discuss their implications, success, and generally how kick-A they are, you've come to the right place.

Later